Monday, August 31, 2009

it's holiday bebeh!

I went bloghopping just now, and for most of us, today doesn't mean any more than a holiday. Some blame the politic and politician, some blame the current economic atmosphere, others just follow trend, it's not cool to be patriotic, I guess.

Especially when we hate the current government, for whatever reason.

If you're a malay, most of you hate the government for not being islamic enough, or not giving enough priviledge to you.

If you're a chinese, you think govt is not fair, everything is subsidised to the Bumiputra.
If you're an indian, well you think you're being neglected.

Mostly, if you are a Malaysian, you think we need to change the government, it's corrupted and we need some fresh leader to bring out fresh leadership style.

And don't be surprise if you don't fit in any of these. It might be because you're just one of those who follow others. You agree with the majority.

There are some who loves the current government, though. Those who benefits from them, or maybe those whose parents are so involved with the current government, they felt in love right from their baby years.

Truth is, no one's wrong. It's your point of view. Your choice, that you've made from informations you gain.

What's wrong is, when we think today is just another holiday. And when we think Merdeka is just a word to be shouted aloud today. That is just wrong.

The hell with your politics view, independence is something everyone should be grateful of.

Not merdeka enough you said? It's not free to say anything we like in this country, and we are so not free to do anything we wish to do, eh? Tell me one place where you can do all that, freely.

I know that this is lame, and by now you must have thought that I am a pro government. If it is, it has nothing to do about me feeling thankful to Allah for giving me a peaceful live in this country.

Peace to me, is no gun shot sound everyday. The ability to receive humble smile from a stranger, and the freedom to eat out in any restaurant i want.

That might sound cheap. But who knows exactly what's the price of peace?

I might be shallow, someone who have not even went out from Malaysia, and read only interesting articles/books. But I'm a human and it's my nature to love peace. Don't we?

And yeah, it's holiday indeed. Everyone is lazying around, peacefully. Right?


Happy Merdeka Day !

Friday, August 28, 2009

No wonderlah my friend pun tak suka you!

Cartoon from Cathy Thorne 2009

Honestly friends (i know readers here are only trusted friends, who say things honestly to me, without aku rasa sakit hati), am i always flirting with man?



I'm married, and I work with man. There's no woman in the compound that I work, except for a clerk and a janitor. Everyday, I am surrounded by man.


As a woman, I'm always in need of friends. So, I make friends with man, they're all that I got here, and what's wrong with that? They're easy to talk with, straight forward, no string attach (i.e takdelah lunch kena pegi dgn kawan tu je, kalau tak ajak gi lunch maka merajuk, no such thing), and they're simple, nobody cares if I do not put on any lipstick for the whole of Jun and July.


I kinda like that.


Just, when one or two of them thought that my kindness means I'm interested in them, I felt wrong. Something must be wrong.

See, I'm not perasan when I said somebody is interested, i received a wrapped box yesterday, with singing hari raya card, from anonymous. Nasib baik one of the officemate told me who put it there.

So I flashback. No wonder he always seemed tersipu2 when he met me, and akan merajuk bila aku tak sembang dengan dia. I'm not a nice girl, so pedulik hapa aku orang merajuk, takde kaitan. Not my friend, not my family.

But when I received that box, I called Shahrun, told him, he laugh and said amik jelah.

Cool, he knows me.


I told my officemate tadi, I am not interested in anyone, and insya Allah setakat ni (god forbid), I am not interested in office flirting or any flirting. I may seem not having a romantic relationship with Shahrun, but we have no intention in listening to any judgement about our relationship (kecuali lah the trusted ones).

But I still need to know if I am :

1. Always talking in a gedik way ? As if I'm flirting?
2. Too mesra, i make people around me uncomfortable and leads to perasan?


3. Doing things that boleh menyebabkan fitnah?

Am I? And is this harassment?

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Purple

That is supposed to be our theme color for Hari Raya this year. Until,
Ilhan insist on white baju kurung cotton with tiny black flowers. That baju is so nice, I can't say no, the price = RM49.90, after less, I get RM45. I said ok, considering the design and the material (english cotton).

I've always go for price first in choosing the kids apparel. But when Ilhan put on this baju, she look so much like Orked from Sepet, except for ther short hair. So there goes RM40.
Since Kakngah is not around we pick the same brand for her. Hers is beige with red and purple small roses. Cute, plus hers is smaller size, so RM40.

So, anyone who are still searching for the kids baju raya, try search Sara Kids.

If Ilhan insisted on sequin-netted kebaya with bright colors, I don't care if she rolled herself on the floor, I won't buy that for her.

Only baju melayu for Ammar, and we're good. For the kids.

For us,

Shahrun said he won't get a new baju melayu, he'll just wanted a shirt with nasyid team's colar.
And I haven't decide mine. I've been eyeing a white chiffon with red+green abstract pattern, tapi mak aih harga.. RM200++.

Patutkah? I'd say tak patut. This week, we'll hunt for baju raya lagi.

But mine will definitely be purple, I think I look good in purple.
So this year, mcm Farra, we'll be colorful!

Monday, August 24, 2009

i miss u

..budak tembam. U have been there almost 3 weeks, when are u coming home?

She said :


Kat sini ada tahi ayam, ayam berak kat kasut kakngah.
Berak kat tangga, berak kat tanah, semua berak..

And next call she begged us to come and take her home by creating a ghost :

semalam kan, kakngah nampak hantu, kat katil nenek.
hmm.. bila kakngah nak boleh balik?

with her lack of L pronunciation.

Well kakngah, latest new : ayah said we'll only meet you during hari raya, as he's busy doing whatever he should be doing, outside Penang. So be patient.

And I think you kinda enjoy it there, it's me who miss you more than u miss us. See u this hari raya eh? Sedihlah lama tak jumpa kakngah..kakak & ammar pun sedih.
kakngah during her bus ride to KBharu

Saturday, August 22, 2009

Hijau memang bagus (ok ayah, biru pun)


Saya kan sedang berusaha untuk menurunkan berat badan, jadi secara naturalnya saya akan mencari resepi yang berasaskan sayur. Sebab kita perlu makan banyak sayur untuk mengurangkan sedikit pengambilan makanan dalam kumpulan karbohidrat & protein.

Jadi, saya terserempak dengan laman ini, dan saya rasa resepi-resepi disini agak mengujakan untuk dicuba.

Saya mencari resepi untuk salad sebenarnya, jadi saya pun menyalin resepi ini.

Separuh jalan, saya senyum. Oh, rupanya nak gantikan bacon, guna tempe sahaja. Yang lebih menarik, tempeh disebut sebagai bacon tiruan (izin laluan, bahasa rojak : ceh, mat saleh ingat orang buat tempe sebab nak tiru bacon ke? tak mengaku jawa lagi bijak dari dia..)

Saya belum cuba, nanti saya cuba, saya ambil gambar dan letakkan disini. Gambar diatas, dari laman tadi.

Friday, August 21, 2009

The synonim of rain

is Taiping.

Sejuk ahh. Kalau puasa kat Taiping, sure tak letih kan?

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

53 years of a woman

She's born in 1956, in a big family, in a small house, in a small kampung. Her father was a bus driver, a thin, black man with tiredness all over his face. Her mother was a housewife, anak mami but with fair complexion. She has 16 siblings, step-siblings as her mother married twice and true-siblings, but both are treated equally.

How could they be treated differently? There's not much food in the kitchen, no space enough to sleep luxuriously, no money to buy decent clothes, no tv, no radio, and soon enough, no mother. Yes, all the 16 lost their beloved mother, at child age. No mom's love, could u imagine 16 small kids without a mom's love?

Love is another thing. How could she live without someone to cook a decent, simple lunch and dinner? Yes, it's only lunch & dinner, no in-between food. And who will help wash all the clothes, the dishes, clean the house? Who will tell the siblings to stop fighting with each other? Who will wipe dirt from her face after she fall? Who?

It's lucky that she has 2 sisters, one step-sister and the other one is just her sister, so they helped with everything. Although, not as perfect as her mother would.

You see among the 16, most of them are boys. And they get rough. They'll conquer the dinner, until there's only rice left. They'll make her wash their clothes & iron it, all sorts of thing u can imagine. Not the boys fault anyway, they have no one to tell them, stop bullying their sister.

The father you said? He's so busy with something we call earning some decent penny. To feed all 16, oh 17 including him. He don't even had time to search for his wife's replacement.

Back to her, so being in such a rough life with the boys, she did learn something : you must do what's needed to survive, no chickening, be firm.

So one day, you knowlah the villagers back then, they loved to accused mom-less children for any menace done in the kampung. So, her brothers were accused for stealing fruits from someone's tree. She knew it was not true.

She went face to face with the makciks, and told them to stop their cruel accusation. That's a girl who was born in 1956, and she's only 5. No girl told makciks that they're wrong in 1961, it is considered rude. But the hell she care, she stood for the right things.

Next day, she wore skirt (the one she managed to loan from her sister), knee level skirt. And she played badminton (also loaned), with her friends, in front of the makciks. Just to let them know, she could do anything she wanted to do, anything that she feels right. Note that skirts are prohibited in 1961, especially in kampung.

Oh, from that moment forward she tell herself that she won't iron her brother's cloth anymore. It's charcoal iron, it's heavy and took a lot of work. So she refuse.

Her father got so mad of her, he refuse to give her, her daily school allowance. That's 5cent anyway. But remember, in 60's 5cents is her lunch, as she has to walk almost 7-8Km to school. But she has planted in her mind, that she'll never do things that she doesn't want to do, plus her brother should do it himself. So, she accept the punishment, and she received 0 cent for a year.

A year! until her father knew that she is somebody he should never take into granted.

I could go forever tell you many stories of her boldness. But it is more appealing to tell everyone, what happen to our bold, brave, outspoken girl now.

She has 5 children, 3 boys and 2 girls, and she's still married to a handsome, romantic man. At age 53, still working and earning quite an amount of money. She could eat whatever she want now, could buy fancy clothes, own cars (quite a brand she own, u know), own house and everything she has always dreamt of.

Most importantly, she took care of her health, so she could spend a lot of time with her children. She has always knew how it feels to lose a mother. She has always wanted to be a good mother, so she listens to her children.

Remember that she's outspoken? So, whenever her children needs a shoulder to cry on, or advice on a fork road, she'll tell them straight away what she thinks about it, no censor, no mushy words. Because to her, that's what they need. Some spanked in the head, and they'll realize that this world, is not made of candy and sweets.

She's a child of Ahmad and Zaharah. And her name - Refeah. Born 18/8/1956, in Kampung Batu Berangkai, Kampar Perak. 53 years of her age, but if you see her personally, she seemed like a 40 years old woman.

53 years of life, and she's the only woman I see that act what she says. She's the first woman I see, when I first come to this world. She's the woman who's been carrying me for 9 months, and has to be transferred from hospitals to hospitals because back then, limited hospitals could do vacuum delivery. How did she manage the pain?

She would, because she's my Mak, she has always manage any pain. 53 years of life, and Allah has answered her prayers, i think most of it. I've always one prayer I'd request Allah to grant it, pls make her life happy, and make her after life happy.

Mak, happy birthday! And no, i'm not crying.

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Nisa

Disebabkan aku pompuan, kenalah aku je yg buat semua report?
Abis lagi 6 orang yg lain tu tambah sorang boss, sebab derang guys, so boleh lah tolak kerja?
Dah la nak dapat feedback yg amat payah.
Korang ingat aku nak derive sendiri ke korang buat keje apa?

Pastu, complain pulak, pompuan tak boleh buat kerja on site,
WTF??
I did more on site job than any of u or even all of u in total.

Shit, shit and shit.

Oh shit to me too.
Why complaint? U are being paid monthly right?
And remember yesterday?
Haa.. camne?

Whatever, others do shit too, and they never care.

Hah marah nya aku.. Dah, jom buat report.
Tuhan je lah yg membalasnya.

Monday, August 17, 2009

should i ?

Get a job - checked
Get Married - checked
Get kids - triple checked
Get a house - checked
Get a car - double checked

But I feel so unsuccesful.

What's next? Or should I get help from them?

i'm so in love with James Evan Wilson


cute eh?


As I'm writing this, around 20 people believed that I'm on leave today.

The story goes : I woke up late, tired and I literally drag my legs to iron Ilhan's uniform. Without taking bath, put on my jeans and shirt, send the children to kindy/nursery, went to staff's office to check up things, and told them all, I'm on leave.

Buy some food, although I have thought of fasting today, I've got 2 more days in debt. And, now I'm home. Called Shahrun, just to make sure I did tell someone I'm taking a day off (ponteng actually), so I felt less guilty. And I reply emails and make sure all calls are answered. Lega.

Not until one unsolve case come in. Aku gelabah, and start thinking that this may be because of I'm absent, remember hukum karma?

Truth is, I'm not that capable of breaking rules. Eventhough I'm breaking one now, I always felt guilty and trying very hard to cover everything. Padahal, org tak kesah pun, and I know if the boss knew that i'm at home and still doing my job, dia tak marah pun.

Aku yg freak out dan skema tak ketuan hala !

Back to the title, I watched House MD rerun just now. I've always thought that I like House. He's funny, sarcastic and smart.

But actually, I love Wilson. He has always triggered ideas to House, and in a way, as funny as House. He's the only man who could read House. Who'd be better, some complicated, no feeling, smart and sharp man OR a friend who always knows reasons behind those complicated thought of him ?

Although, on small note i should put behind this post, House is a lot more good looking.

Ain't he?


Owh ok, don't know why I'm in lazy mode today, but this mode has made me swallow nasi with fish curry, 2 cups of choc ice-cream, and 2 slice of choc cake.
Am i depressed? Over what? Huh, meh tidoq lah. Lunch time org tak call.

** Both images are from Wikipedia

Saturday, August 15, 2009

Ships

Back in Uni, I have a friend whose father build ships, some kind of engineer lah. She doesn't tell much about it, and I'm not asking anyway, I've never been in a ship, except if ferry is considered a ship.

To cut it short, as I'm prone to belit2 kan story to get to the point, recently I visited a shipyard. Oh bukan an actual visit, work related. But I enjoyed it so much.

To those who are as blur or pemalas baca macam I, shipyard is a place to repair and build ship. We have it a few in Malaysia.

Ship in the making, a tanker to be specific


The one I visited of course in Penang, and it's for commercial ship. We have a shipyard for navy too, aku baru tau, shallow kan?



Another ship, this one is a surveillance ship; for oil surveying.

Anyway, the one we have in Penang is owned by a big company (Boustead, formerly known as PSCI), and for me it's a big business, walaupun aku tak pernah tgk shipyard lain.

a big propeller for surveyor ship, normal tanker has smaller propeller


It's like ada 3-4 kapal yg in progress, and 2 ship already launched.

Ada banyak questions in my mind walaupun kerja aku tak siap lagi masa tu, like
- how the hell did they tampal a big dinding on the ship, and seal it ? And
- how are they making sure that the seal is tight enough, water couldn't come in?
- The ship is build on land, how do they launch it to the sea?

Masa tengah buat kerja, adalah mamat jaga telecommunication sorang ni rajin borak. Soalan yg paling aku curios la aku tanya :

Aku : How did u guys pull or push the ship to
sea?

Mamat : U mean launch the ship?

Aku : Oo that's the word, ok how?

Mamat : U agak mcm mana?

Aku : Angkat pakai crane tak logic, u guys push and pull
with something ke?

Mamat : Pakai crane
patah lah. Actually ada byk cara nak launch a ship. But yg
paling recent kita guna balloon. Murah.

Aku : Owh, macam mana guna balloon?

Mamat : I nak explain pun tak pandai, I've the video, but
the CD i left at home. Mcm ni lah, u cari internet, ship launching.

guna crane memang tak logic

So I did. Oo, macam ni.









Cool eh?

Anyway, soalan lain tak sempat tanya.

And Zee Avi is also cool.

Menu today

Pagi - Mee sanggul goreng sendiri
Petang - 'terpaksa' abiskan happy meal anak aku, plus her sundae cone.
Malam - Mee sanggul pagi tadi + pears.

Exercise - zero, exercise mulut je, kids nowadays..

Friday, August 14, 2009

pointers

I'm mad at myself for these reasons :

  1. I've not been watching my diet, so hangat taik ayam. Just because Shahrun dearest don't. Hoi, remember he has badminton twice a week!
  2. I swear starting from today, I'll watch my diet again. After today's hearty nasi with dalca, courtesy of ex-staff with 1/3 of EPF money.
  3. Running around in the house has stopped, since last week. Alasan - MIL datang, so malulah nak exercise. Stop sekali stop selama2nya.
  4. But I never stop taking the stairs instead of lift at my office. That is my only penyelamat dari kecewa & kalah for the time being.
  5. Mulalah takut nak weigh myself. I measure myself with cloth, kalau dah muat baru ok. So far, tak muat.
  6. The main issue here is tummy. How meh? My mother has been nagging about me not taking my jamu. Weather so hot, how to take jamu ?
  7. Have not start my sit up yet, how tummy nak flat?

Which explains the long pause in blog updating. Sigh